Diets

I like to start diets at the most inopportune times, like two days before Thanksgiving or on Christmas eve. I don’t know what my problem is. If I had to psychoanalyze myself, I’d probably say I was setting myself up for failure. But that is not how it feels at commencement; it feels very earnest as in “I don’t care what tomorrow is, I’m starting today!” But you can imagine how it ends.
So the past couple days, I’ve been contemplating, let’s just call it, healthy eating. The list of reasons why is boring, and redundant, so I’ll spare you and me. Then I’m reading this article from Food Network magazine about how much activity you need to do to burn off certain popular summer treats. And some of it is not relatable; I don’t row or play tennis. I don’t play basketball or jump rope (that’s actually a hilarious thought), and on a plus side I don’t eat lobster rolls… which means I just spared myself an hour of swimming, awesome! I do have the yard work thing under lock down which means I burned off two pieces of fried chicken last night (that’s like the same as a reuben sandwich right?) Anyway I put down my bag of honey mustard pretzels and said ok. Let’s do it. There’s not even a holiday scheduled for weeks so there’s that, momentum.

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